Tuesday, April 17, 2012

What no one tells you about parenting.

I remember when I was pregnant with Audrey. I got TONS of advice and forewarnings. "Buy lots of diapers!" "Sleep when she does!"

Then after she was born. "Enjoy it now, it goes by too fast." "Just wait until she's old enough to ____."

What no one ever warned me about was other kids.

We're going through some big problems here at Audrey's school. Apparently several kids in the class have taken it upon themselves to torment her. First it was one little girl pushing her around (physically) back in December/January. That was addressed. Then it was a little boy saying horrible things about her to everyone, making sure she heard in late January-March. Then he joined forces yesterday with a group of 3 known troublemakers to continue it.

Audrey came home yesterday sobbing. She wanted to know why, "So many kids at my new school are mean to me. Why don't they like me?" How the hell do you answer that question?

I emailed her teacher. She called and emailed me back. They are taking it very seriously, it is a big deal, and they know what's going on.

The kids have all been separated. They cannot even play together at recess (the troublemakers, and they have to stay away from Audrey). Their parents have been called. The teacher let them have it, talking about how we treat others and such. The guidance counselor is coming in today to their class to further 'help'.

The teacher is very apologetic. She assures me Audrey has done nothing wrong, nothing to become a target, that she is the sweetest little girl and so very smart and friendly. That somehow these kids just 'chose' her.

Audrey is begging to be transferred to a TD-specific school (talent development, the gifted program she is now in). We decided to leave her at her current school, where they cluster the gifted kids (so they put all of them in one classroom, or split them into two large groups if need be, so there's 20 in 2 different rooms). But we know she'll see these kids at recess and such.

How do you handle that as a parent? I'm all for confronting your problems, but this isn't Audrey's problem to confront. She's doing everything right and being thrown to the wolves every day. Then I think about the highest-risk to be bullied, JT. And I think I can't let this school slide regardless because he's only 2 years behind her, and I don't want him going through this.

For the next few weeks, we're watching closely to see how this is handled. If they can't address it in a satisfactory manner, we will be putting in our request for Audrey to transfer to another school. It will be hard on our one-car family to get everyone everywhere, but if I have to sit in the car for an extra hour a day to ensure Audrey isn't tormented every day, that's what I'll do.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: bullies SUCK.

1 comment:

  1. How sad. I am not looking forward to potentially dealing with that kind of stuff.