That is the single word I would have used to describe myself prior to the CHOP/Amelia fiasco came to light.
While so many have come out in support of Amelia, there are some who have voiced their opinions that people like Amelia, people with disabilities, aren't worth it.
An article on Huffington Post (sorry, I refuse to link to it, because it distresses me greatly) completely misses the point of Amelia not needing to be on a wait list, but goes on about how people with disabilities should not be on waitlists for organs, because how upsetting would that be that a disabled person got that kidney when someone's beloved aunt didn't get one.
I had no idea. No. Freaking. Idea. Shock is an understatement.
And I wonder... Where is the line that decides who is deserving and who is not? Are we saying that only certain disabilities are undeserving? ADHD? Autism? CP? Down's? Dyslexia? Bipolar? Schizophrenia? Depression?
And here's my observation: these people seem to want to not include those who can't speak for themselves. They seem to target those who can't fight back, labeling their lives as 'not worth living'. Not worth saving. Better off dead.
If you have EVER met a person who cannot speak, you know this is a ridiculous assumption. Non-verbal people live lives much like our own: happy moments, sad moments, and everything in between. The difference is they face more challenges.
And I struggle, because I don't know how to reach these people. To show them that disabled people are people just like us. And I worry that they are unreachable. And I am terrified that if there are this many people speaking up in support of such an atrocious point of view, that many more lie in the woodworks, agreeing in silence.
And my ONLY prayer is that in my life, I can change this just a little. Maybe, if each of us touched by disability can change it just a little, people will start to see the value in those that are different.