Yay for reading!

This is our most difficult area with JT.

Lately he has been loving A Squirrel's Tale (Richard Fowler).

Then last night we bought him Lego City 3, 2, 1 Liftoff! He loves it, too.

It's so great that he's starting to enjoy reading. He's in a family of readers - The Hubs and I both love to read, and Audrey is reading at almost a 6th grade level and is buried in books constantly.

Go JT!

An emotional book fair.

Tonight we went to the kids' book fair at school.

As soon as we walked in, a little boy stood up in the hallway (he was sitting waiting for his parents) and shouted, "JT! JT! Hi JT!"

He ran up to meet us, and said hello to JT. JT said hello, then turned to us and said, "It's so-and-so" (my heart was about to explode, I didn't catch his name). He told us how JT is in Mr. Dussek's class with him sometimes, but is in a special class the rest of the time. The little guy asked JT about his Lego, JT managed a few responses, and then the little boy's older brother made him sit back down. 

So we go and get our books, and we're standing in line. This little girl appears out of nowhere, and JT starts giggling as she says, "Hey JT!!!" He looked up and said, "It's Mackenzie!!!" SUPER excited, and they waved to each other. 

He ran back up to say hey to her as we were leaving. 

Then a teacher (we have never met her, she's just another teacher in the school) was giving out leis to the students. Audrey grabbed one, and then the teacher pulled JT over. She asked him if he wanted one, and he said yes. She knew exactly how to handle him. Then she had him pick out a color, and made sure he got the one he wanted. 


So thankful for what their school is doing, because clearly they're doing something really, really right in regards to helping students understand and be friends with my boy. 



Apparently book fairs can be pretty emotional places!

What no one tells you about parenting.

I remember when I was pregnant with Audrey. I got TONS of advice and forewarnings. "Buy lots of diapers!" "Sleep when she does!"

Then after she was born. "Enjoy it now, it goes by too fast." "Just wait until she's old enough to ____."

What no one ever warned me about was other kids.

We're going through some big problems here at Audrey's school. Apparently several kids in the class have taken it upon themselves to torment her. First it was one little girl pushing her around (physically) back in December/January. That was addressed. Then it was a little boy saying horrible things about her to everyone, making sure she heard in late January-March. Then he joined forces yesterday with a group of 3 known troublemakers to continue it.

Audrey came home yesterday sobbing. She wanted to know why, "So many kids at my new school are mean to me. Why don't they like me?" How the hell do you answer that question?

I emailed her teacher. She called and emailed me back. They are taking it very seriously, it is a big deal, and they know what's going on.

The kids have all been separated. They cannot even play together at recess (the troublemakers, and they have to stay away from Audrey). Their parents have been called. The teacher let them have it, talking about how we treat others and such. The guidance counselor is coming in today to their class to further 'help'.

The teacher is very apologetic. She assures me Audrey has done nothing wrong, nothing to become a target, that she is the sweetest little girl and so very smart and friendly. That somehow these kids just 'chose' her.

Audrey is begging to be transferred to a TD-specific school (talent development, the gifted program she is now in). We decided to leave her at her current school, where they cluster the gifted kids (so they put all of them in one classroom, or split them into two large groups if need be, so there's 20 in 2 different rooms). But we know she'll see these kids at recess and such.

How do you handle that as a parent? I'm all for confronting your problems, but this isn't Audrey's problem to confront. She's doing everything right and being thrown to the wolves every day. Then I think about the highest-risk to be bullied, JT. And I think I can't let this school slide regardless because he's only 2 years behind her, and I don't want him going through this.

For the next few weeks, we're watching closely to see how this is handled. If they can't address it in a satisfactory manner, we will be putting in our request for Audrey to transfer to another school. It will be hard on our one-car family to get everyone everywhere, but if I have to sit in the car for an extra hour a day to ensure Audrey isn't tormented every day, that's what I'll do.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: bullies SUCK.

Guess what?

Today is my first day blogging at Hopeful Parents!

It would be awesome if you'd go take a look at my post, Stepping back. 

Spring break & progress.

We're nearing the end of our spring break, and we have had so much fun. Crafts like wave bottles, permanent sand sculptures, gel bottles and sand art. Daily visits to the gym (the kiddos love the child care!). Lunch with daddy.

Of course Audrey also had allergy testing - the one with individual shots (not the panel) - despite the pain, she survived 25 separate shots! JT saw his new doctor and is starting medication for ADHD.

Best of all, JT swallows pills now! The new medicine is only available in pill form, and can't be broken in any way. He said he would, and he did! Day 3 and he did it in one sip :)

He's way more talkative, he's got some new, big words - tonight he said something smelled 'horrible' (it was Audrey, and after we cracked up we convinced her he was messing around).

JT has suddenly become Mr. Social. In Target Friday he made everyone say hi to him. He would jump out and say, "Hey there!" - sometimes stepping in front of carts to ensure they responded. Then at Dillard's he followed up his 'Hey there' with "I gotta find my way outta here!" It was funny, but we have to help him make it more appropriate. Talking to strangers is not always okay.

Tonight he randomly asked me to cut his nails. And cut his hair. Both amazing.

Also, at another appointment, he asked to have his blood pressure taken. We have never been able to get him to do that!

I'm so excited for him to go back to school and see if his teachers notice his progress!

Letter to politicians.

Dear {Representative, Senator, President},

As you may or may not be aware, today is World Autism Awareness Day.

Also, the CDC has released the latest statistics on autism. 1 in every 88 children born in 2008 have autism.

While this number is striking, what is more interesting is that this number is 4 years old.

According to CDC statistics, autism has been rising at an alarming 13% a year (on average) since 2000.

Based on these numbers, the statistics for this year is 1 in 54.

1 in 54. Take a moment to think about that. That is nearly 2% of our population - of your constituents - that have a disability.

Now I would like to introduce another statistic. One that is difficult to stomach. Did you know that only 70% of autistic adults are able to live and function independently as adults?

I want you to think ahead 10 years and consider the numbers. That means that 70% of the 1 in 54 - 1 in 77 (more than 1%) of our population in the United States will be on disability for autism alone. That does not include other physical, mental or cognitive disabilities.

Our great country is currently underfunding research in this disability. Currently, the NIH is only providing 0.6% of its' funding to go towards determining the causes and treatments of this disorder.

Not only that, but many states refuse to provide safeguards to ensure that autistic children's insurance provide adequate services (which, by the way, could cut lifelong costs by 2/3, according to statistics provided by Autism Speaks).

Please make April more than Autism Awareness Month. Please prove that this country is committed to providing answers and help to families living with this disorder everyday.

At 1 in 88, we do not need simple 'Awareness'. We need help. NOW.

Sincerely,
{Kate Duzan}

Senators
Representatives
President

Our autism.

Today kicks of Autism Awareness Month...

So today, I'll talk about 'our' autism.

Our autism is a funny little boy. He is ever-moving, dashing by in a flash on his tiptoes, humming his happy autism noise.

He is loud, but scared of loud noises. He hates the vacuum, requiring us to take him outside, for a ride, anywhere but here when we use one.

He is a very selective eater. At times, he is down to very few foods he will eat. At one time about a year ago, he was eating only popcorn, and I was giving him whole chocolate milk laced with infant vitamins.

Once a hater of all things requiring a pencil and paper, he loves to draw, write, color. He brings home the funniest drawings from school every week. And the sweetest. Last week he brought home a picture of me and him together. It melted my heart.

He is kind. He loves to tell us how 'good' we are, that he loves us. He loves to give random, unexpected kisses on arms, legs, cheeks... anywhere but the mouth.

He loves to script. I often know exactly how his day went by listening to a play by play recording from the backseat. I hear many Phineas and Ferb episodes (complete with "There you are, Perry!").

He loves old school cartoons. Inspector Gadget. Woody the Woodpecker. He also loves Wild Kratts and other nature shows.

Legos are his deal. Especially Lego figurines. He has at least 50, and can tell you if a single one is missing.

Our JT is good at math. At science. He is learning (quickly) how to read - he loves words. He doesn't understand social norms and how to make friends. And he wants them.

His favorite color is usually yellow. Sometimes red. His favorite food is cheetos. And brownies (hello, typical kid things).

Our autism sometimes causes a scene. Squeaking angrily at a checkout line that is a bit too long for him to handle. Screeching at the thought of having to do something that doesn't fit in the plan in his mind. Having to do one more thing when he is (and uses sign language to remind us) "All done."

He loves the mall. He hates brushing his hair. He likes baths, but doesn't like water on his head.

He loves his sister more than anything.

He is our world.

Every child with autism is different. So, when you think about autism, remember that every story is different. But remember that these children - these 1 in 88 - these children are someone's world, just like our JT is.